Tuesday, December 3, 2013

What The Hell Was I Thinking?

As a firm believer in tempting fate, I should have known better than to comment about my newborn only crying for a reason.  I don't know why I put that out there, but fate has come around and bit me right in the ass.  The child does not stop screaming.  Not matter what I do.  It's starting to drive me a little bonkers.  

I've been doing my best to decipher the cries, and so far here's what I've determined:
  • He cries when he's hungry
  • He cries when he's dirty
  • He cries when he's wet
  • He cries when he frets
  • He cries when it's bright
  • He cries when it's night
  • He cries when put down
  • He cries when carried around
  • He cries so I go away
  • He cries so I would stay
  • He cries
  • He cries
  • Good God He Cries
And even though this is very Dr. Seuss, but it's 100% true.  Seriously, I mean what the fuck!  I'm starting to believe it's personal.  He doesn't go off the deep end with my wife.  I think he's realized that my wife is the feeder, I'm just the holder, and he screams until he's brought up to the buffet.

As for my other son, I spoke about his love of being a big brother.  That one came back around to screw me.  All it took was my son mumbling 3 little words...

                 "Baby, Lets Go!"

I turn around and saw my 2 year old, trying to lift the 3 week old, to bring him to the other room.  I don't trust this child to carry around an IPAD, so you can imagine my mindset when he's trying to pick up his brother.  Especially since we're still making the payments on the little guy (Thank you PPO's)

I should learn for the future to just keep my big mouth shut.  And in the meantime try to keep my sanity while this child screams all hours of the night.

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