Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Don't Take Me...

What do you do when your child is throwing a tantrum in public?  You leave, right?  Between everyone with camera phones, and ready availability of child services, options to this particular problem are extremely limited.  This was the dilemma I faced when my oldest started screaming in a mall the other day.

We're in Sears, and this has not been a pleasant trip at all.  He was tired, he was screaming, and he was pushing my last button.  So after his third screaming refusal to the notion of riding in the stroller, I got pissed.  I got down on his level, looked in the eye, and sternly told him, "That's it, I'm taking you home!"

His reaction was to scream, "DON'T TAKE ME!!!  NO GO HOME WITH YOU!!!"

To say this drew a little bit of attention would be an understatement.  A just to paint the picture a little clearer, my wife's white.  I'm not.  If you take a good look at both of us, there is no doubt that I'm his father.  But to the narrow minded passerby, I just look like a chubby pervert attempting to abduct a child.

So he's keeps screaming "DON'T TAKE ME HOME WITH YOU", people are starting to gather, then fortunately, he changed his song by one word"


Thank one little word saved me quite the headache.  At that moment I wanted to both kill him, and hug him.  So I did what any other responsible father would do...

I carried his as under my arm, while pushing the stroller with one hand, yelling at him all the way until we got home.

It's been a long time...

It's been quite a while since my last post.  Fortunately everyone is healthy and happy, and by some miracle my kids have managed to survive. 

The oldest, is now three years old, and consistently providing new material.  The youngest is now 8 months and not as demanding as he once was.

It's time to start this again, for no other purpose than my own sanity.  If anyone reads it, I hope you enjoy my stories of ever escalating frustration.